Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained/Lost

Dick Meyers asked me if I had an opinion as to why only Black women joined the Village while Black men, if ever, rarely did.  I told him that I would try to find out since I wasn’t sure, having not thought about it.

One man I approached said that he didn’t like joining a social group of White people where once again he would be spending his time trying to be seen as an equal. 

He said he has dealt with that, on a daily basis on his job, all of his life and just living day to day.

A game of cards on an evening, a sporting event, a sharing with someone who has lived what he has lived and has finally been able to escape it, is enough for him.  I don’t want to return to what will always be.  Retirement has lifted that burden.

Another man said, “Black men don’t do certain things.  We don’t seek counseling; we hold our own counsel.  We don’t join things unless our wives make us.  Heck! We’re only just now, some of us, agreeing to have colonoscopies.  All those things we see as kinds of invasions.”

The third man said, “Black women join things because, in today’s society, their existence is not threatened in the way that a Black man’s still is.  The fact that in many extensions of Black men’s lives they have no power.

Being shown that fact on nearly a daily basis is not conducive to establishing trust within that same society of people.

He said, he didn’t want to find himself having to prove anything anymore – not at this stage of his life.

He said, “Remember the old Negro spiritual that goes, ‘Burdens down Lord-’?  That’s what I’ve done.  I’ve lain my burdens down!”

There are Black men out there who don’t feel like this, but these 3 men are the ones who spoke.

*Footnote - On September 11, 2026 at 12pm, the 1619 Group will plan to discuss this issue in terms of racial barriers to social engagement. 

Lora Harrington Pride  8/15/26