February 2026

January 2026

Support Groups: Who, What, When, Where, and Why?

Should they be tight groups of five or six that get together regularly to share life struggles and joys with the same close buddies, or should they be drop-in groups to meet and greet and thus support? As the current leader of Conversations and Support, a group that meets on the second Saturday of each month at the Corner Bakery in Hastings Ranch, I set out to look at trends and comments and puzzles from Village members including me, a “wanna be” group leader.

There was a need for a Saturday event. With the death of my husband, I found that my weekly activities grew but weekends were lonely. I couldn't depend on my adult children to entertain me or include me (What, they deserve their own life?). I saw a listing for the Conversation and Support group on Saturday mornings, and I attended.

Michelle Kuczma, dear Villager, was leading the group at this time, but she was traveling. Sitting outside the Corner Bakery was one person with a homemade Pasadena Village sign, and we chatted over a cup of coffee. I like chatting and I like coffee; I enjoyed it. The next month, I went back and two new people were there. We chatted over coffee; I enjoyed it. The next month, I roamed the interior of the restaurant boldly announcing myself (I am of the bold persuasion) and one lonely Villager stood up. We chatted over coffee; I enjoyed it. This went on over the months.

Michelle came back, and we experienced the same patterns. If someone returned for a  second time, we found we were repeating the same stories. Interesting, but already told. We tried having a theme "What are your favorite Pasadena restaurants?" That didn't work. 

OK, maybe we needed a "star." Let's invite a board member to be our special guest to talk about the board (Thank you, Wayne April.) and have the event publicized by Hannah. Eighteen people showed up! We couldn't all fit into the location. We pulled over chairs, but we couldn't hear each other. Chairs were two-deep, making coffee drinking impossible. Some new Villager commented "What are we here to support?" 

The next month, I was eager to see if there were returnees. One person showed up. We chatted over coffee.

Since then, I have talked to leaders of current small groups. The Sassy Sisters and Cute Crones are small, tight groups of long-time members who talk privately about their feelings and experiences in life. They do not accept drop-ins. There might be openings for new members in the future. Their leaders can be reached by phone or email. The Caregivers Support Group meets successfully for those in need of community and advice in their long-term journey of home caregiving for loved ones. 

“Adapting when Life Gets Tough” is a strong support group that meets twice a month on Zoom. Under the direction of Esther Gillies, this solid group has no agenda. “Bring your thoughts, worries, and challenges about getting older, and we can talk.”  According to Esther, this group formed during the early months of the pandemic. They asked themselves how would members communicate when they couldn’t get to the Village or any group meeting place? How would Villagers cope when they couldn’t meet in person and were isolated in their homes? How would Villagers handle this hiccup in life? With Esther’s guidance and growing confidence in zoom, eighteen people came together to share their trepidation. Now, with eight or more regular members (more are welcome), folks just come as they are and talk about issues of the moment. Esther is unstructured and welcoming.

Director Katie had more news. She stated, “There is an interest in an in-person support group on a weekday - we’ll see about starting one in April. Stay tuned.”  She also related that Gary Kinsley is hosting the Care Lunch on Monday, March 23 in the Community Room at Pasadena Village. The program partner, One Generation, is supporting this lunch for adults who are caring for a loved one and who have been impacted by the Eaton Fire. One Generation is a local non-profit. Katie also says, “We will also talk to the caregivers who attend about future programs they might like.”

Yes, there is an interest in small groups. I have no answers concerning how they should be formed and how they should be run. But, I enjoyed the process of analyzing my group and hearing from others. As Dick Myers says, “It all works!”

Keep me posted with your thoughts and experiences. I like coffee; I would enjoy meeting you.