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October 2024

September 2024

August 2024

1619 Wide Ranging Interests
08/19/2024

1619 Wide Ranging Interests
08/19/2024

First Anniversary
08/19/2024

Alexandra Leaving by Leonard Cohen
08/16/2024

Muse des Beaux Arts by W. H. Auden
08/16/2024

The God Abandons Antony by Constantinos P. Cavafy
08/16/2024

Ch – Ch – Ch –Changes
08/15/2024

Cultural Activities Team offers an ‘embarrassment of riches’
08/15/2024

Engaging in Pasadena Village
08/15/2024

Future Housing Options
08/15/2024

Message from the President
08/15/2024

There Are Authors Among Us
08/15/2024

Villagers Welcome New Members at the Tournament Park Picnic
08/15/2024

Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night by Dylan Thomas
08/14/2024

A narrow Fellow in the Grass by Emily Dickinson
08/13/2024

Haikus
08/13/2024

One Art by Elizabeth Bishop
08/13/2024

Poem 20 by Pablo Neruda
08/13/2024

Still I Rise by Maya Angelou
08/13/2024

Trees by Joyce Kilmer
08/13/2024

July 2024

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Emergency Preparedness: Are You Ready?
05/28/2024

Farewell from the 2023/24 Social Work Interns
05/28/2024

Gina on the Horizon
05/28/2024

Mark Your Calendars for the Healthy Aging Research California Virtual Summit
05/28/2024

Meet Our New Development Associate
05/28/2024

Putting the Strategic Plan into Practice
05/28/2024

Washington Park: Pasadena’s Rediscovered Gem
05/28/2024

Introducing Civil Rights Discussions
05/22/2024

Rumor of Humor #2416
05/14/2024

Rumor of Humor #2417
05/14/2024

Rumor of Humor #2417
05/14/2024

Rumor of Humor #2418
05/14/2024

Springtime Visitors
05/07/2024

Freezing for a Good Cause – Credit, That Is
05/02/2024

No Discussion Meeting on May 3rd
05/02/2024

An Apparently Normal Person Author Presentation and Book-signing
05/01/2024

Flintridge Center: Pasadena Village’s Neighbor That Changes Lives
05/01/2024

Pasadena Celebrates Older Americans Month 2024
05/01/2024

The 2024 Pasadena Village Volunteer Appreciation Lunch
05/01/2024

Woman of the Year: Katy Townsend
05/01/2024

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First Anniversary

By Edward A. Rinderle
Posted: 08/19/2024
Tags: ed rinderle

What comes to mind when you hear the phrase “First Anniversary”?   Most likely you recall a celebration of the first year of marriage.  How did you commemorate the event?  Dinner out, to your special place, or maybe to that fancy restaurant you've been wanting to try?  A trip, to a nearby favorite getaway or to somewhere more distant and new?   A show – a drama, a comedy, a musical, a musical comedy?   A quiet time at home, just the two of you?   However you celebrated, the anniversary was likely a time of joyful remembrance.  I have had the pleasure of celebrating two such occasions.

But this past July 30 brought a different kind of First Anniversary into my life – the one-year anniversary of the death of my beloved wife, Jean.  

I thought long and hard about the occasion.  Would the blues dominate the day?  Would I feel joy over the outpouring of love I have experienced over the past year?  A little of both, perhaps?  In order to deal with whatever emotions presented themselves, I felt that I needed to plan the day in advance.  Then I could better pay appropriate homage to Jean, whatever I was feeling. 

Here is what I planned.  First, a visit to my therapist, scheduled weeks before.  Then a walk along Honolulu Avenue in downtown Montrose – just a few blocks away from where we spent 20-plus years together.  Back at home, I would play some of my favorite music on YouTube – music that had been with me for much of the year.  And finally, my weekly visit to Brothers Helpers, a group that packs food for the hungry.  At the latter, I planned to announce my anniversary and read something I wrote a while back:  “Gardenias”, a tribute to Jean.

My plan worked, leading me to one of the most memorable days of my life.  My therapist was as loving and supportive as ever, maybe even more so.  Reminiscences on my walk  brought the usual mixture of joy and grief, this time with the joy winning out.  The music brought both goose bumps and tears.  And once I finished reading “Gardenias”, my friends at Brothers Helpers gave me an applause accompanied by kind thoughts and wishes.  I was overwhelmed.

So where do I go from here?  For starters, I resolve to encourage the significant changes I feel at work within me, even if they sound crazy.  I will welcome the boundless love sent my way, and in so doing, I will learn to love myself, perhaps for the first time.  I will watch for opportunities, great or small, to share the love I feel.  Most of all, I will revel in the glory of this abundant Life around us, populated by so many remarkable people.  

Here I am, Life.  Bring it on!

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